I spent most of yesterday and today finishing up with all of the woodwork on my guitar except for the finish sanding. After I finish sanding the body it will be time to dye, clear coat, apply a black burst and then a bunch of clear coats and then let it cure for six weeks before I can assemble it for good. This is an exercise in patience.
Check out the progress pictures here.
Thanks to Sambo, Bobby, or whateverthehell he wants to call himself today for this one…
A virile, young Italian male was relaxing at his favorite bar in Rome, when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde. Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment, and after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom and made love.
After a pleasant interlude, he asked with a smile,”So…you finish?”
She paused for a second, frowned and admitted, “No.”
Surprised, the young man reached for her and the love making resumed. This time she thrashes about wildly and there are screams of passion. The lovemaking ends, and again, the young man smiles, and again he asks, “You finish?”
And again, after a short pause, she returns his smile, cuddles closer to him, and softly says, “No.”
Stunned, but damned if this woman is going to outlast him, the young man reaches for the woman again. Using the last of his strength, he barely manages it, but they climax simultaneously, screaming, clawing and ripping the bed sheets.
The exhausted man falls onto his back, gasping. Barely able to turn his head, he looks into her eyes, smiles proudly, and asks again, “You finish?”
Barely able to speak, she whispers in his ear, “No! I Norwegian.”
Ba-dum-dum *crash*
Remember the real reason we celebrate Easter… but before you do here is a little vile humor for you to ask forgiveness for laughing at:
And now, a message from our sponsors:
I have always been a GM man. This is evident through the string of vehicles I have owned. There were three Chevys, two GMCs, a GEO, a Pontiac and a Saturn. I guess it is how I was raised. My parents always had GM products (except for when Mom went on her German speed-toy binge for a few years… but that is a whole other story). My oldest brother always has had Chevys. Somehow the middle brother ended up being a huge Ford fan. He races Fords, he owns them, he works on them in his shop, etc. I do find great pleasure in harassing him… his race car is a 1969 Mustang. My daily driver? A 1969 Z/28 Camaro. It’s a picture perfect rivalry. I have never cared for Fords… even Mustangs or ‘Mud Stains’ as I like to not-so-affectionately refer to them.
My wife loves the first generation Mustangs. Her dream has always been a 64 1/2 convertible. Me? I never have much liked any of them. I have to admit that the Shelby GT500 was pretty cool, but that’s about my limit.
Man, was I in for a shock late last year when the ‘05 Mustangs started showing up. The first one I saw in person was ’sonic blue’ in color and I almost wrecked my car while trying to get a better look at it. OK, it was actually my wife’s car… shhh… don’t tell. I mean, DAMN! The new Mustang is probably the finest aesthetic design to come out of Detroit in as long as I can remember. It is modern, but definitely has the wonderful 1960s muscle car attitude. It rocks. I would own/drive one in a heartbeat (wait, that was a chevy reference wasn’t it?) I can’t wait until they come out with the SVT Cobra model… that will be soooooo sweet.
I would love to see Chevy bring the Camaro back by taking it’s styling cues from the 67-69 models. That is when they had ‘tude.
There is actually one other car that recently came out that I also think is pretty freaking cool (not on the Mustang level): Dodge Magnum RT. SHE says ‘It’s a freakin station wagon’. I say, ‘It’s got a HEMI!!!’ 
Thanks to Sambo for providing today’s diversion.
Five (5) challenges follow. It is strongly recommended that you read each challenge carefully. Immediacy, however, is essential when answering.
1st challenge:
You are participating in a race. You
overtake the second runner. In what
position are you now?
If you answered that you are first,
then you are absolutely wrong!
If you overtake the second runner
and you take his place, you are second!
Feeling a bit silly? The second question
must be answered even more quickly.
2nd challenge:
If you overtake the last person, then you
are in what position?
If you answered that you are in the
penultimate position, you are wrong
again. It is quite impossible to overtake
the last person.
Getting concerned about your reading
comprehension skills?
Following is a simple math problem that
specifically requires mental addition.
Use of any external tools, e.g., pen and
paper, calculator, etc., is prohibited.
3rd challenge:
Add one thousand plus forty plus one
thousand plus thirty plus one thousand
plus twenty plus one thousand plus ten.
If your total was 5000 you are wrong.
Carefully add again or confirm with your
calculator that 4100 is the correct answer.
Maybe you are just not at your best today.
4th challenge:
Mary’s father has five daughters.
Names of four, using the vowels
in sequence, are Nana, Nene, NiNi
and Nono. What is the name of the
fifth daughter?
The name of the fifth daughter is not
Nunu. Mary is the name of daughter
number five.
5th challenge:
A mute (Politically correctness
dictates that we use “speech impaired,”
an inefficient use of words to say the
least.) man shops for a toothbrush.
By imitating the action of brushing one’s
teeth he successfully communicates with
the sales person and proceeds to close
the purchase transaction.
A blind man (Political correctness insists
that we refer to him as being “visually
impaired,” but enough of such
ridiculous nonsense.) shops for a pair
of sunglasses. How should he best
express himself?
Nothing was said about him being mute.
He therefore has only to verbalize his
request.
Assuming that each challenge is
equally valued at 20 and you scored
100, then you are possibly qualified
to run the institution.
Well, the nefster only got 3 of 5. I better start paying more attention.
I’m lacking the time or creative juices to come up with anything on my own, so here is a joke that Sambo sent to me. Enjoy!
Dr. Phil was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.
“You all have obsessions,” he observed.
To the first mother, he said, “You are obsessed with eating. You’ve even named your daughter Candy.”
He turned to the second mom. “Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child’s name, Penny.”
He turns to the third mom. “Your obsession is alcohol. This, too, manifests itself in your child’s name, Brandy.”
At that point, the fourth mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, “Come on Dick, we’re leaving.
It appears that the United Kingdom does not agree with our recent election outcome.
very funny…
(more…)
Happy Birthday man! I am honored to be a friend to someone as old … enfeebled … wise and knowledgeable as you!!
Herein is the richest trove of home schooling
and self-educational resources I’ve seen
anywhere. Thousands of textbooks, software,
games, journals, and books–all gallantly
reviewed and evaluated by a homeschool
mom who must never sleep. -KK
The Hypnerotomachia Poliphili, with its unpronounceable
title, indecipherable text, and unidentifiable author, is one
of the most puzzling, enigmatic and fascinating books ever
conceived. Since its publication (1499), it has surprised its
readers with its vast knowledge of architecture and landscape
and garden design, but also engineering, painting and
sculpture. Part fictional narrative, and part scholarly treatise,
the book is, in addition, an extreme expression of erotic
furore, aimed at everything, especially architecture, that the
protagonist Poliphilo encounters in his quest for his beloved
Polia, whose name translated from the Greek as meaning “many
things.” The book is also a political manifesto defending the
right of women to express their own sexuality and the
superiority of Eros, beauty and knowledge over aggression
and war.
The WordPress interface is making ritilan feel a bit slow
this morning please forgive my poor formating until I
get the hang of it.
I’ve just disproven the old saying that “Cheater’s never win”. I cheated and I won! I’m a winner! I’m a winner! I, Natalie, am a winner!!
(Oh wait, I don’t suppose I should be advertising that fact, though. Disregard that last statement. Please strike it from the record.)
So, I’ve been given the opportunity to guest blog over here at Nef’s place. What an honor! I’ve never posted on a guy’s blog before. I feel a little weird about it all. I mean what am I supposed to talk about?
Boobs? Well, I do have two of them. Oh! I’m getting a mammogram done next week. That’s a good topic, right? No? Really? Ooookay. Moving along then.
Beer? Now this is a topic that I could go on and on about. Beer, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, elev.. Oh, I suppose you don’t want to listen to me literally count the ways, eh? Hmm.
Cars? Now we’re talking! Cars and I go waaaaay back. In fact, I started driving when I was twelve! Being that I’m so experienced at driving and in my dealings with cars, I can give you lots of good advice. (Oh stop it! They don’t need to know that I drive my car into flood waters or back into cars parked behind me in the driveway. You are ruining my credibility over here!)
Computers? We do have a lot of computers around here. Ones that sit on the desk. Ones that sit under the desk (but are still called desktops — explain that one to me). Ones that sit on your lap. Ones with big, bulky monitors. Ones with thin, flat screens. See? I’m well versed on the subject of computers. It’s probably best that I leave it up to the expert though, eh? (I know, I know, you thought I was an expert what with the vast array of computers I just spouted off about.)
Gosh, what else do guys talk about? They’re such one-dimensional creatures. All they care about is babes, brew, buggies and boxes. (No, not boxeRs. I’m not talking about underwear with you guys, I barely know you! Boxes — like “This is my Linux box. She’s my pride and joy.”)
Anyway, I’m worried that should I talk about my regular topics like “Cheer or Tide? Which one works best on those pesky stains?” or “Vacuums: To bag or not to bag?” that I might alienate the readers of this masculine blog. I’d sure hate to do that. This is my first time here after all. I’d hate to wear out my welcome before I even got started.
You know what? I think I’ll quit while I’m ahead. If Nef will have me back, perhaps I’ll come up with a topic that will appeal to the masses. That will cross the gender lines. That will CHANGE. THE. WORLD. (Or maybe not, but we’ll never know unless I’m given another opportunity, will we?)
Thanks for having me, Nef. It’s been real nice.
Jenn here! Can you believe that this guy handed over the keys to his blog to me? I mean, sure a stranger would be respectful. A stranger would clean up before they leave. A stranger would be polite.
That SO is not going to happen with a wife! I mean, I have issues with this man. Things like not replacing the toilet paper roll when it is empty. Or for saying things like “So what have you done today?” as he looks around the not-so-clean house. Or my all time favorite “Have you done laundry? I am out of ______.” But I am a good wife and won’t discuss such things. (Yes, I will. But I am trying to make a good impression. He probably won’t read past the first paragraph anyway. We’ll be safe.) Oh, and if you are looking for any cool WoTD or some equally impressive geek-like entry, you are going to be disappointed. I only babble-ass.
SO, let’s talk dirt on nef. Want to know some deep dark secrets that only a wife can tell you? Goodie!
There was this one time (No, not at band camp) that he….
Oh crap…he just got home. I am going to have to finish this later.
So I check on the package that UPS busted and lost parts out of… and shipped back to the vendor without even asking…
The status showed that the vendor received it this morning. When I called them around lunch time they asked me why I changed boxes and sent it back?!?!?! I told them that I did not reject it… that I never even saw it. They were amazed. Then I asked what was missing/broken. … it was at this point that I became amazed…. or dumbfounded… they told me NOTHING WAS MISSING OR DAMAGED. IF UPS HAD JUST DELIVERED THE DAMN PACKAGE EVERYTHING WOULD HAVE BEEN FINE. AAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!
UPS SUCKS!!!! … but I’m not bitter.
You know, when you have an database that contains passwords, the content of your blog etc etc… it’s generally a good idea to have the mdb file someplace that’s not part of your www share. DUH!!! Maybe I could just set it up as available for anonymous FTP… or even better… maybe I’ll just put all of the passwords and admin logins right into this blog entry… they are:
